Hello Pencileers!

We love simplicity! That’s why we sell pencils. That’s why this email is plain text, and not some flashy, epilepsy-inducing HTML that looks like a 17 year-old’s MySpace page (MySpace: that’s a thing, right?).

Because we love simplicity, we want to bring you simple, easy-to-remember promotions. No $13.45 off a purchase of 13 items that total up to be three times the square root of 16654, but only when the moon is in the seventh house and Sam the Groundhog sees his shadow. No, that’s not our style.

In that spirit, this week, we offer you $10 off an order totaling $50 or more. That’s right. One-fifth off the price. Spend at least a, uh, Ulysses S. Grant, get, um, an Alexander Hamilton off (we totally had to look that up).

Just put together your order, enter “JBTENOFF” in the coupon code field, and enjoy your discount! Use that ten dollars to go see a movie, get your car washed, or although it’s no fun, put it into your kid’s college fund. (That should buy them another seven minutes of classes.) In any case, enjoy the rest of your March!

Yours in Pencilnalia,

The Pencil-Pushers of Pencils.com